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Aruba in General All general questions about Aruba. |
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Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large,
raging, violent river. Needing to get on the other side, the first man prayed, "God, please give me the strength to cross the river." Poof! God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swim across in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice. After witnessing that, the second man prayed, "God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river." Poof! God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs and he was able to row across in about an hour after almost capsizing once. Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed, "God,please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river." Poof! He was turned into a woman. She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards up stream and walked across the bridge. |
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that's the 'noodle syndrome'
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See Donnie.. I knew you were a closet comedian! LOL!
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Wahoowa |
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Subject: Husbands
Another truism about husbands: Stephanie's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside each and every day. One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. You know what?" "What, dear?" Stephanie gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth. "I think you're bad luck." |
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I am new to the board & have been enjoying reading all of your funnies. Can anyone join in as long as they are clean??????
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
#10
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Our Mistress, excuse me, our Moderator has been very lenient hooked, come on onboard!!
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#11
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of course you can. the moment you signed up you became a part of the family. welcome, enjoy and contribute anywhere you want. remember PG-13!!!!! hahahahahaha
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#12
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Ok here goes.......(I have been noticing some Western Pennsylvanians on the board--me too--so this might make you laugh)
Three men were traveling and happened to meet at a bar in Ohio. One man was from Texas, one from North Carolina, and one from Pennsylvania. They got acquainted and started talking about their problems with their wives. The guy from Texas began by saying, "I told my wife in no uncertain terms that from now on she would have to do all of the cooking. Well the first day after I told her, I saw nothing. The second day I saw nothing. But on the third day when I came home from work, the table was set, a wonderful dinner was prepared with wine and even dessert." Then the man from North Carolina spoke up, "I sat my wife down and told her that she would have to do the shopping and also do the cleaning. The first day I saw nothing. The second day I saw nothing. But on the third day when I came home, the whole house was spotless, and in the pantry the shelves were filled with groceries. The fellow from Pennsylvania was married to an enlightened woman from the Pittsburgh area. He sat up straight on the bar stool, pushed out his chest and said, "I gave my wife a stern look and told her, that from now on she would have to do the cooking, shopping and house cleaning. Well the first day I saw nothing. The second day I still saw nothing. But on the third day, I could see a little bit out of my left eye...
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
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A drunken man walks into a biker bar, sits down at the bar and orders a drink. Looking around, he sees three men sitting at a corner table. He gets up, staggers to the table, leans over, looks the biggest, meanest, biker in the face and says: "I went by your grandma's house today and I saw her in the hallway buck naked. Man, she is one fine looking woman!"
The biker looks at him and doesn't say a word. His buddies are confused, because he is one bad biker and would fight at the drop of a hat. The drunk leans on the table again and says: "I got it on with your grandma and she is good, the best I ever had!" The biker's buddies are starting to get really mad but the biker still says nothing. The drunk leans on the table one more time and says, "I'll tell you something else, boy, your grandma liked it!" At this point the biker stands up, takes the drunk by the shoulders looks him square in the eyes and says, "Grandpa,....... Go home, you're drunk |
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So glad this thread was started...I was getting tired of lurking...need to be able to type something to my friends...I miss all the bantering....
Suzie |
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loved it hooked...you are truly and officially one of us!
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I thought that one might go over well. Maybe tomorrow I'll post more if the thread is still going strong--I've been saving jokes for years from email so I have lots!! You all are pretty funny, I have been enjoying reading everyones posts in the few days I've been on the board.
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
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Bring the jokes on. We all have a great sense of humor. |
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We have been to Aruba twice--January 2004 & January 2005, this year we bought a vacation points/timeshare because we love it so much. Friends of ours(that we now travel with to Aruba) have been visiting Aruba annually for the last 10 years or so & asked us to join them for many years. 2004 we were able to join them at the last minute & I must say It was everything & more than they said it was. We'll be there January 26 thru 29th, 2006. It can't come soon enough. I'm ready to go again right now!! If I hit the lottery before January, you'll know where to find me!!!!!!
When do you all visit paradise???? Where do you stay???
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Sorry, been workin all day we will be there from january 12th - 29th, 2006---3 days would never be enough!!!!!
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
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We bought at LaCabana, but have never stayed there---we hope it is nice. But who cares it's Aruba!!!!!!
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Welcome, hooked! I went to Aruba for the first time 5 years ago, using my husband's boss's timeshare in Aruba at LaCabana. We were so in love we bought a week there ourselves. LaCabana is clean, roomy, lots of fun people and the staff is first rate. Try the Islander Grill next to the pool or Pasta Possibilities for lunch - very good. Happy Hour is at 4:30 everyday! I do not recommend the restaurants there for dinner. Check out some of our reviews on the review thread for some other ideas. And remember, if you want reservations for anything, from dinner to boat rides, just go to the Guest Relations desk in the main lobby. Upstairs in the main lobby is an internet cafe. PS - also the Dunkin Donuts in the back for breakfast. Any other questions, let me know! |
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Thanks Corrine for the info & the welcome! Sorry I'm just now getting back to you but I am only on the board when i'm at work 8am to 5pm cause my computer at home is sick right now. It's in rehab & should be well soon. We don't care much about leaving to have dinner at night since the food in Aruba is soooooooooo wonderful! We do (at least the guys) care about Happy Hours----although being in Aruba seems to be one BIG happy hour!! We were at LaCabana for Happy Hour the day we took the tour/presentation. I have been checking out the restaurant reviews & I even gave a few! Our favorites are Le Petit, Don Carlos & friends of ours (actually the couple we travel with) own Bingo's. One of the owners was manager/bartender at the Kokoa Bar on a dock on the beach between the Radisson & Wyndham---we had many "fun" times there!!!!! When do you visit Aruba?
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
#31
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![]() Next year - back to April. I think you will really like LaCabana. I can't think of anything negative, except maybe it's pretty crowded during school vacation weeks. |
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BTW--is that you in the pic? I have to go thru my computer at home & dig out a good pic to put on mine!
The beginning of our trip in January will be over Martin Luther King weekend (Jan 12 - 29, 2006), our kids & their friends 13, 21, 24 & 26 ("we have yours, mine & ours" & the 13 year old was a suprise gift)will be along for the first 6 days then they go home & we stay. So I was figuring it might be busier then. Although I think January & February are pretty busy in Aruba anyway. We don't have weeks, we have the points---we are using them up for this trip with extra rooms for all the kids, but someday we hope to be able to visit more than once a year. I am ready to go again now---especially since I have been on this board talking to all of you!
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
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DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!
Wanda's dishwasher quit working so she called a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, "I'll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I'll mail you a check." "Oh, by the way don't worry about my bulldog. He won't bother you. But, whatever you do, do NOT, under ANY circumstances, talk to my parrot!" "I REPEAT, DO NOT TALK TO MY PARROT!!!" When the repairman arrived at Wanda's apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest looking bulldog he has ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work. The parrot, however, drove him nuts the whole time with his incessant yelling, cursing and name calling. Finally the repairman couldn't contain himself any longer and yelled, "Shut up, you stupid, ugly bird!" To which the parrot replied, "Get him, Spike!" |
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Oh Oh....... too late...... why couldn't he have kept his mouth shut!!!!
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Very good Elaine.
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I'm not sure what this is but it seems to apply to a bunch of Aruba lovers like us!!!
One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. And here's how it went: "Well ya see Norm, it's like this...A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members." "In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
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Oh Nooooo, now they'll say that we need to drink!!! ![]() |
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Ok, here's one for the girls............................
Here are the top 10 things that men understand about women: 10. 9. 8. 7. 6. 5. 4. 3. 2. 1. (You guessed it)
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
#39
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Very good, hooked and Elaine!
Yes, that is me hooked I think from last year at the Flying Fishbone. That is Jamie with me! |
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That pic just makes me want to be there all the more!!!!!
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
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#42
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A pastor wanted to raise money for his church, and on being told that there was a fortune in horse racing, decided to purchase one and enter it in the races. However, at the local auction, the going price for a horse was so high that he ended up buying a donkey instead. He figured that since he had it, he might as well go ahead and enter it in the races. To his surprise, the donkey came in third.
The next day the local paper carried this headline: PASTOR'S *** SHOWS. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and this time it won. The local paper read: PASTOR'S *** OUT FRONT. The Bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race. The next day, the local paper headline read: BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR'S ***. This was too much for the Bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent. The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day: NUN HAS BEST *** IN TOWN. The Bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for ten dollars. The next day the paper read: NUN SELLS *** FOR $10.00. This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild. The next day the headlines read: NUN ANNOUNCES HER *** IS WILD AND FREE. The bishop was buried the next day... _________________ |
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#44
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Come on Dogwriter!!! How are you going to have a business with all women, when you don't understand them??? Now you get it?
ruba |
#45
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Good One donnie!!!!!
Since we're on this subject, How about this one............. Sitting behind a couple of nuns at a baseball game (with their habits partially blocking the view), three men decided to badger the nuns in an effort to get them to move. In a very loud voice, the first guy said, "I think I'm going to move to Utah , there are only 100 nuns there." The second guy spoke up and said, "I want to go to Montana, there are only 50 nuns there." The third guy said, "I want to go to Idaho , there are only 25 nuns there." One of the nuns turned around, looked at the men, and in a very sweet calm voice said, "Why don't you go to Hell...... there aren't any Nuns there." whoops, is this PG-13??????
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
#46
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hooked...good one! I think you fell in the pg-13 range.
ruba |
#47
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Maybe that's the point!!!!!
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
#48
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hooked...we both get the point, now Dogwriter needs to get it lol
ruba |
#49
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Do you think some of them ever will?????? I think I have another funny along those lines I'll look for it! How's things in New Ken?????
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We ![]() ![]() January 12, 2011 CAN'T WAIT!!!! ![]() |
#50
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Hey you two. Leave Dogwriter alone! He gets the point! There may not be job offers now ruba!!!!
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